READERS RESPOND: Should you "friend" your students?

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Permalink Reply by Marsha Redd on October 5, 2009 at 5:13am

There has been a great deal of talk about the downside to having students see our pictures and other personal things that might be posted on Facebook. My response to that is why would you want to have things posted on Facebook that you wouldn't want students to see? If you are uncomfortable with students seeing that unsavory college picture of you, you should be uncomfortable having anyone see it. I don't worry about what students see on my Facebook page because I behave on social networks the same way that I behave in any public place. Facebook is a public place after all.

Whitney Wilkewitz said:

Rebecca Seigneur said:

I believe that it is best to be up front with your students about your use of facebook. Tell them that you have one (they'll just find you anyways, haha). My personal stance on it is to tell my students that I have a facebook but I will not accept any of their friend requests until after they graduate. I feel that at this time, your link with the students is less precarious and maybe you can begin to see them on more of a peer-peer level rather than teacher-student..

Rebecca Seigneur, French Education, Bowling Green, Ohio

I agree with Miss Seigneur. Whether or not you tell your students you have a Facebook profile it is likely they are going to find out anyway. However, I do not advocate becoming friends with them via Facebook or any other social networking site. Developing close personal/non-professional relationships with students at school is strongly discouraged so I do not see why it should be any different when the medium is the internet instead of face to face interaction. If students really want a way to contact you and interact in a professional manner outside of the classroom I suggest setting up a class website where discussion about in-class activities, homework, and other related subjects to school or your content area can take place through the use of discussion boards and blog posts. I feel it is also important to stress internet etiquette to your students no matter what the content area and what kind of behavior is acceptable when using social networking sites, blogs, and other tools available on the internet regardless of if it is school related or not. Besides, do you really want your students to see the pictures of you from college that you forgot to delete? Or do you really want to know what your students are doing on the weekends? It is safer for your students and for your reputation and life as a professional to just say no to Facebook friend-ing your students until after they have graduated from high school.

Whitney Wilkewitz, French Education Major, Bowling Green, Ohio

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Permalink Reply by Herb Coleman on October 5, 2009 at 8:18am

@Marsha Redd Actually Facebook is not public. The public can know that I have an account but they can only see what I allow until I friend them. The other thing you may want to consider is that it's not only you posting pictures of your younger days. Your friends and high or college acquaintances have many of those pictures and they may post them as well. The kinds "ashamed" we're talking about here is not any thing salacious but I was reminded not long ago of my own "big hair" days (I could have been a member of the Jackson 5 and that was in the 80's).

My major point is that I may be cordial and even friendly with my students but until they are no longer my students they cannot be party of my party circle. This is why I felt compelled to open a second Facebook account to use with business associates and students who request that I friend them. My main account is for true family and friends. This has not been without it's own issues but has made things manageable.

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Permalink Reply by Jeanne Sammon on October 5, 2009 at 9:09am

As a pre-service teacher in my semester before student teaching I am going to say that I would not "friend" my students at this time in my career. I do not think with the environment that I am in right now it would be conducive to teaching at this time. Yes, it may be great to have that interaction with your students, but if you are online having students as "friends" administrators may look down upon that and question it. If you see your students outside of school that is great, saying "hi" to them is fine. I do not think that if they try to "friend" you on Facebook or Myspace or any other social networking site that you should. Sure your page may be professional, but it's not for the students to know about. There should be some boundaries between school and your outside life.

Jeanne Sammon, AYA Math Major, Bowling Green, OH

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Permalink Reply by Erika Bentley on October 5, 2009 at 9:10am

I do not think that middle or secondary teachers should friend their students. The only way a teacher should friend a student is if it's for a classroom assignment or a means of communicating with students. Even then, teachers should not give students all of their personal information or show all of their pictures, but instead have a professional facebook and a private facebook. This way students can communicate with their teacher via facebook and get them know them on a more professional level. Of course teachers should tell their students about themselves, but only to a certain extent. Being a college student, I am friends with two of my professors and an old high school student, but even so, I am no longer in their classes and it is a way to keep in touch. It is a little different than a high school student being friends with a teacher, though, to some extent it is still a little odd. This is a touchy subject and should be handled with care and common sense.

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Permalink Reply by Dustin Mills on October 6, 2009 at 7:24pm

I think the appropriateness of "friending" students on social networking sites depends on the teacher, the students, and the community. Teachers need to have established themselves as respected educators in their community and have enough wisdom and experience to keep an online relationship professional.

I agree with a few others on here that, at this point in my career (a pre-service teacher), it wouldn't be appropriate for me to friend my students on Facebook. While I see the value in connecting with my students and modeling appropriate public behavior online, I feel it's too risky. My mentors caution me to keep my relationship with my students professional, as they will want to be friends with me since I am only a few years older. I'll want to wait until I've gotten several years of experience under my belt. Once I've established myself in the community and put some years between me and my students, I'll consider it.

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Permalink Reply by Marsha Redd on October 7, 2009 at 5:26am

Dustin's insight is a good one. I am 57 years old and have the luxury of a more parental (or grandparental) persona. This affords me the ability to interact with students as a Facebook friend without some of the concerns faced by younger, newer teachers.

Dustin Mills said:

I think the appropriateness of "friending" students on social networking sites depends on the teacher, the students, and the community. Teachers need to have established themselves as respected educators in their community and have enough wisdom and experience to keep an online relationship professional.

I agree with a few others on here that, at this point in my career (a pre-service teacher), it wouldn't be appropriate for me to friend my students on Facebook. While I see the value in connecting with my students and modeling appropriate public behavior online, I feel it's too risky. My mentors caution me to keep my relationship with my students professional, as they will want to be friends with me since I am only a few years older. I'll want to wait until I've gotten several years of experience under my belt. Once I've established myself in the community and put some years between me and my students, I'll consider it.

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Permalink Reply by Marsha Redd on October 7, 2009 at 5:28am

I've mentioned this before, but I think it bears repeating. I don't think any teacher should friend middle school or younger students for the simple reason that Facebook itself requires its members to be at least 13.

Erika Bentley said:

I do not think that middle or secondary teachers should friend their students. The only way a teacher should friend a student is if it's for a classroom assignment or a means of communicating with students. Even then, teachers should not give students all of their personal information or show all of their pictures, but instead have a professional facebook and a private facebook. This way students can communicate with their teacher via facebook and get them know them on a more professional level. Of course teachers should tell their students about themselves, but only to a certain extent. Being a college student, I am friends with two of my professors and an old high school student, but even so, I am no longer in their classes and it is a way to keep in touch. It is a little different than a high school student being friends with a teacher, though, to some extent it is still a little odd. This is a touchy subject and should be handled with care and common sense.

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Permalink Reply by Ash Christie on October 7, 2009 at 6:31pm

In response to this thread, I feel that when dealing with social networking sites such as Facebook and MySpace that is a certain line that has to be drawn when dealing with students and whether or not a professional should be their friend. In my opinion I do not think that I would ever friend a student just because of legal and ethical ramifications. I am not saying that I have anything to hide, it is just that sometimes people post item or other things on your wall or page that you might not see right way and this could cause problems. I do however understand the point of view that these sites have some benefits in the classroom. I do not think that class pages are a bad idea. In fact I think that they could be a very good resource for students. But when it comes to students viewing my own personal page I have a problem. I think there is a line between a teacher's personal life and their professional life. This line should not be crossed and in my thinking "friending a student" is taking an unnecessary risk. I do believe that these sites can be used in a professional manner but I would rather be safe than sorry when it comes to my job.

Ash Christie, Bowling Green Ohio, University student

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